1. The party doesn't start until Turlough walks in.
2. Turlough is everything Leatherpants!Draco wants to be but isn't.
3. Turlough knows where the Doctor keeps his porn
4. Turlough started naked Thursday on the TARDIS
5. Turlough found the Doctor's stash
6. Turlough was going to wear leather pants but The Doctor mentions they were going to the beach.
7. Turlough is has no soul
9. Turlough can kill with a hatstand.
10. Turlough told your Mum, Thanks.
11. Turlough told your Dad thanks as well.
12. Turlough is far superior to any earth twink.
13. Turlough stole the biscuits from the biscuit jar. Tegan blamed the Doctor.